The Passionate Marriage® Approach to Love, Sex, and Intimacy in Committed Relationships
Using wisdom developed through three decades of couples therapy, The Passionate Marriage® Approach to
relationship education offers the general public revolutionary ways of approaching sex, intimacy, and conflict in
love relationships. Materials in our Passionate Marriage series of publications and workshops emphasize:
Marriage is a natural "people-growing process" and sexual boredom, lack of passion, and "communication difficulties" are what drive it. Your relationship is shaped by more than unresolved childhood issues, past "wounds," or problems in your family-of-origin. Emotionally committed relationships become contentious because these growth processes surface in sexual interactions and other intimate exchanges. Marital problems are not situational difficulties to be solved or avoided. Going through these dilemmas makes us capable of deep intimacy, profound desire, and meaningful sex. Unsolvable conflicts and sexual difficulties are midpoints in a healthy relationship, rather than signs of personal inadequacy, incompatibility, or falling out of love. 
The Passionate Marriage Approach emphasizes life-long sexual development rather than merely curing
desire problems or sexual dysfunctions. People get better in bed as they get older. Most people never reach
their sexual potential, and those who do are generally into their 40s, 50s, and 60s. This surprises the many
people who confuse genital prime with sexual prime, but you are more capable of an intensely intimate sexual
relationships as you mature (become more differentiated).
The Passionate Marriage Approach shows how your relationship with yourself controls intimate connection
and sexual desire for your partner. Relying on your partner to give you a positive reflected sense of self
(as most people do) limits intimacy and desire. However, this revolutionary approach gives you concrete ways to
build a solid sense of self while getting closer to your partner and more invested in your relationship.
Most marital enrichment approaches emphasize other-validated intimacy: expecting empathy, reciprocity, and validation from your partner when you disclose. The Passionate Marriage Approach emphasizes self-validated intimacy; validating and accepting your own disclosures, and soothing your own heart. This shift allows you to resolve emotional gridlock, intimacy problems, sexual boredom and low desire, and develop a more passionate loving relationship. 
The Passionate Marriage Approach decodes the "language" of sex, revealing how sexual interactions say a
lot about you, your partner, and your relationship. It emphasizes intimate and emotional connection during sex
rather than focusing on "touch techniques." Discover new psychological styles and dimensions of sexual experience.
Learn how eyes-open sex can create hot passion and new intimacy, and make you grow. Better sex doesn't automatically
create a better relationship, but the personal growth required to enhance sex and intimacy also improves marriage
in other ways. You'll learn ways of maintaining yourself in your marriage that will improve all your relationships.
The Passionate Marriage Approach explores how love relationships involve two-choice dilemmas: difficult decisions and severe tests of selfhood ("crucibles"). For example:
The Passionate Marriage Approach honors the strength it takes to love on Life's terms. This no-nonsense adult approach harnesses the natural processes of marriage to help you become truly capable of loving. You can purchase Passionate Marriage: Sex, Love, and Intimacy in Emotionally-Committed Relationships at our on-line store. All materials, and contents of this website, unless otherwise noted, are copyright 1991-2008 by
David Schnarch, Ph. D. All rights reserved. Intellectual property laws also apply. No reproduction for any
reason is permitted.
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